My mind doesn’t work quite right. I know, earth-shattering stuff, but hear me out. We all interpret or have feelings about things that differ from one another. Some of us see the sunlight and think about its warmth and recognize how beautiful the world is around us when lit up. Others can think about how hot and uncomfortable it makes us. The opposite of sunlight is darkness, the night. That can bring about feelings of calm, peaceful rest or it can be associated with tension and apprehension about facing tomorrow. It all depends on who you are, how you think and the experiences you have that have led to that thought process.
This is not an uncommon or unique paradox. In fact, it’s been around since almost the beginning of time. “The Allegory of the Cave” is one of the most famous (and original) views on the way we perceive the world around us. For those that don’t know about it, you can look it up anywhere on the web and there are even animated videos on YouTube for you non-readers. But I don’t suppose I have many “non-readers” perusing my blog to begin with.
I’ll try to summarize it for the benefit of this discussion. There are also multiple variations but I’ll keep it broad. It is the story of 3 people that have been held prisoner in a cave since birth. They are chained up in a manner that forces them to face the wall on the opposite side from the cave opening. They are unable to turn their heads and can only face the wall in front of them. All they are able to see are occasional shadows on the wall in front of them that are reflected by a fire behind them with puppeteers carrying objects to convey images of people and animals. Over the years, they begin to name the shadows that appear on the wall and identify each activity they see. While all in black and white shadowy vision, as the years pass, their eyes have become adjusted to the dark and that is all they know.
One day, one of the prisoner’s shackles break and he is able to walk to the opening of the cave. At this point, he discovers the sun and he can’t see because of its power. He is fearful and contemplates returning inside or pushing forward. However, the longer he stays near the opening of the cave, the more adjusted his eyes become and he begins to be able to see around him. He begins to explore the outside world and begins to see the color of his surroundings made visible by the sun along with the people and the animals that have provided all of the background for what he thought the world was. He begins to notice that they have a texture he never before understood, they are so well defined in the light of day. He is overwhelmed by what he sees and returns to the cave to tell the other two about the new world he’s discovered. They reject him and his descriptions thinking he has totally lost his marbles and it must be a side effect of going out in the sun, outside the safety of the cave. He offers to free them so they can see for themselves but they physically refuse and demand that he leave them just like they are because they understand the world they are in.
There are many layers to the lessons that can be taken from this story. First, the symbolism of the cave and the fire represent people living in ignorance or oblivion only seeing what is being projected in front of them. The shadows symbolize perception and limited understanding. We are chained to the world we are living in and only know and understand what it is we see and deal with on a daily basis. When we are taken out of our element or comfort zone, we can be figuratively blinded by our surroundings and want to run back to what we know. But many times, as we open our eyes, hearts and minds to the new surroundings, we realize that there is more to the world than the limited shadows we are used to seeing. Further, we can sometimes try to bring friends with us to our “new world” and receive push back because it’s not what they are used to and they aren’t quite ready to step out of their comfort zone.
I believe that we all reach the point in our lives, if we live long enough, where we face this issue in our own way. Maybe it’s maturity, maybe it’s the world evolving, or maybe it’s just our own minds continuing to develop. The world is absolutely evolving but it’s also majorly screwed up. And I don’t think I will ever fully mature so, for now, I’m leaning on my mind being in some sort of “continuing education” stage. The question I keep going back to though is whether or not I am wasting some portion of my life on something that isn’t real. I can tell you that I used to waste a lot of my life on things that weren’t real but I’d like to think that I have advanced past some of that. Some days I can’t convince myself.
Entertain me for a moment and think about your daily life and this allegory. My day begins with waking up and wanting to stay in bed for the rest of the day. Everyday, it’s the same feeling. Then I take one of the kids to school or a sitter and go to work to get started on contributing to society in some form or fashion. There are lots of unreal things that happen during that typical work day, or at least I pray they aren’t really happening. After work, it’s either softball or to the house to work on supper, the laundry, and general housework. This is the part where Alicia says, “Housework?” Then it’s a shower, some TV, some social media and darkness. I say darkness because sleep usually comes several hours after the darkness. I have been doing pretty much that exact same thing for the majority of the last nine years, since Bailey was born.
Now think about how easy it is to lock in on that day after day after day. That becomes the world to me. No bombings, no terrorism, no war, no gun control, no transgender bathrooms, no elections, no racial tensions, no false outrage, no conspiracy theories. When I pull up Facebook and I see someone carrying the torch for the anti police movement or the anti Target movement or the NeverTrump or NeverHillary movements, it makes me think (sometimes aloud) why those things mean so much to them. Am I saying these things don’t matter? No – but 90% of the people fighting for or against these causes can’t give one meaningful example of when those things personally affected their lives. Before your morals get offended or you start challenging why I think who the President of the US is would be considered trivial, I want to remind you of the terms “meaningful” and “personally affected” and also went with 90%. We can all read and share a viral article that may or may not contain facts and proudly broadcast our stance. That’s not a very hard thing to do and it’s generally met with resounding likes from like minded friends. Feel free to share the hell out of this post because I need more subscribers. But you must agree with my opinion…..joking.
I’m not getting sidetracked on government and LGBT issues. I am using those as examples of what I am questioning to be real or not. It is clearly real to some people but is it real for me? Which brings me to a few culminating questions: Should I lose sleep about things that don’t affect me? Because something doesn’t affect me today, does it mean it won’t affect me tomorrow? If something doesn’t affect me, am I cluttering my mind or soul by even knowing about it? If I am avoiding knowing about something does it mean I am cold and don’t care? I don’t know the answer to these questions. That’s why I am having this discussion on paper now. I may never know. What I do know is that I ask myself these questions a lot. The older I get, the more they seem relevant.
Ultimately I think I have to decide which side I want to be on. Do I want to live in a world where everything is comfortable and risk missing out on something? Or do I want to push my limits and experience some of the things the world has to offer outside of my view but risk being caught up in an environment where I can’t see anymore because it’s too unfamiliar and brash? I truly haven’t decided. I think my opinion changes from day to day. I think there is something that is out there that I need to find. I don’t know what it is I am even looking for but I feel like it is out there, outside of this cave. I just can’t seem to get the courage or strength up to break these shackles.
Of course, this might actually be it. This might be the truth that I am living. There may be nothing more. I would not be unfulfilled but I think I would be a little surprised and probably at least a little disappointed in some recess of my soul. The disappointment would arise from my belief all along that there was another life out there – that there was more truth to find and the day to day experiences I get bogged down in weren’t shadows after all. It’s always possible that this is it. That brings me to a song that I recommend you taking a listen to and marinating over for a brief time. The song is called “The Window“and it’s based on other interpretations of the Allegory of the Cave and similar works. It really speaks to this issue and conveys some of the feelings I have when I lose myself in these thoughts.
“All that I’ve known’s within the walls of this room, where there’s a window, roughly boarded up. It’s true the gaps are patched, but even through the tiny cracks I feel a wind blow, I see a light of strangest hue. Late in the night I lay awake, my eyes fixed on the window. I strained my ears until I thought that I might have heard a song, somehow hiding in the soft glow, old as time and ever new. I found a note scratched in the wall, in a pained and earnest scrawl. The hand, I recognized, was somehow mine…..I read each line with dread: ~There’s no wind and there’s no light, there’s no song you hear at night, there’s nowhere to hide, be terrified, it’s all inside your head.~ There’s nothing I can say – there’s no way I can prove, that there’s a place, beyond this room. But still, there’s something in the way the light comes shining through and in the way the curtains move.”
Am I in a room? A cave? Or is this my world?
J-Dub